We found out 6 weeks ago my mum had cancer. 2 weeks later, on her 82nd birthday we were told it was stage 4 nsclc palliative care only. It had spread to her liver and spine. From the day we were told she just went down hill and was in pain and suffering. We’ve had no time to process she had cancer let alone that she has now died from it. My dad looked after her at home and I visited often and took her to all her appointments and moved in the last week. When things got really bad we couldn’t manage her pain and she was transferred to a hospice and there we were told she only had hours left. I didn’t leave her side. She died 16 hours later I slept with her all night and held her hand and was there for her last breath. At the moment all I feel is relief that she is not suffering. I cried every day she suffered. I cried all the time at the hospice and now I don’t know what’s happening to me I feel in shock and like I haven’t processed it. I’m exhausted so is my dad. My sister died 2 years ago of a brain haemorrhage it was very sudden and I cried constantly but this is different