Cancer Research UK main site

Loss of Mum to bladder cancer Sept 24 - struggling with the memories of caring with her in her last few weeks

Ccmyplaymate
Offline

Hello,

I am still struggling with the loss of Mum. I will be 50 this year and each day feels a struggle. I miss her texts and popping to see her at Mum and Dad's home. I hate visiting the cemetery as it confirms our loss. x I am hoping it will get easier so I can enjoy my life. I feel it has brought me ill health, aches and pains where I never knew. x I try to remember the good times with Mum but the rawness of caring for her in her last few weeks at home with Dad and my sister is there in my head most days. I can hear her pain and cries and see the awful bed sores and see her body wasting away. Does anyone have any useful tips to try and combat this at all?

  • A very warm welcome to Cancer Chat CCmyplaymate although I'm really sorry to hear about your mum. You have my sincerest condolences for your loss.

    Coping with grief is very tough, even more so when the memories of caring for your mum in the last few weeks of her life keep replaying in your mind, but I hope it helps to know that so many of our members have been through this as well so you are not alone CCmyplaymate, and hopefully some of them will stop by soon to offer their support and share their experiences and advice.

    You're very welcome to talk to our cancer nurses about this on 0808 800 4040, Monday - Friday between 9a.m - 5p.m but if you haven't done so already, you may want to speak to your GP if you feel like you're struggling with this at the moment.

    Some of our members have found bereavement counselling to be really useful as well, so if this is something you feel may help you, do consider reaching out to Cruse Bereavement Care or the National Bereavement Service for further support and advice.

    In the meantime, be kind to yourself CCmyplaymate and try to take things one day at a time. It may not seem like it right now, but there will be better days ahead.

    Kind regards,

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

Speak to a nurse

Quick links

Follow us

Registered with Fundraising Regulator (logo)
Cancer Research UK is a registered charity in England and Wales (1089464), Scotland (SC041666), the Isle of Man (1103) and Jersey (247). A company limited by guarantee. Registered company in England and Wales (4325234) and the Isle of Man (5713F). Registered address: 2 Redman Place, London, E20 1JQ.