I was a member of the armed forces for a long time, and yes in the course of some of my duties, unfortunately people were more than harmed. no one wanted this, but it happens. Although this prays on the mind of any soldier,you have to accept this and carry on. what you are not trained for is that your youngest son dies of cancer at 44 years old leaving behind his wife and two lovely children. I thought that my training would kick in somehow, but I just cannot stop crying, I put on a brave face for my wife and my daughter in law, and the grandkids, but when I am on my own I just fall to pieces. Is this normal behaviour or am I just weak?