My dad was given palliative care at the hospice and died 4 days ago. We sat with him as a family and held his hands the whole time and when he took his last breath.  I'm really struggling that he's not here anymore.  He didn't know he was dying, and wasn't aware of being in the hospice. I wouldn't let anyone speak negative when he was a round and I told him he would be back on his feet and well soon. 

6 days before losing my dad, I lost my bestfriend to cancer. She was diagnosed in August and died on 10th November.  I also helped to care for her and visited everyday.

I'm so lost and I keep going into hysterics when I start crying.  I don't know how im going to manage 2 funerals