Welcome to Cancer Chat. I'm so sorry to hear of your losses - this sounds like a lot to deal with and I can of course understand this must be incredibly difficult.
I'm not sure if you've reached out for further support with this - it may be helpful to do so if you haven't already. The organisation Cruse have a lot of helpful resources, as well as a helpline. You can also get information about local support in your area for people to speak to.
I also hope this forum can be of some help to you, and that you get some more replies to your post here soon. You can also browse or search the forum (using the bar at the top of the page) for other relevant discussions and people to connect with. It is a welcoming community of people and I hope it can be useful, even if it's simply writing things down.
Take care of yourself, keep speaking to others around you - and we are always here if you need it.
Hi there, seen this and wanted to reply. I lost my dad last June, suddenly, 71, week later my mum who hadn’t been well was diagnosed with lung cancer, she had a bad back and put it down to sciatica, not going into all the details it was stage 4 cancer, hence the pain, it had spread into her spine amongst other places. Spent the next 13 weeks looking after her at home, her wishes, she died October 3rd, just 69. as an only child at 48 I find it hard to accept they aren’t here anymore, they weren’t even old and I feel robbed that they were taken away from me. I still think of them at home and wonder what they are doing. Only for the reality to hit. I have to maintain the property whilst in probate and it’s awful going there to an empty house, it’s almost stopping me coming to terms and accepting what’s happened. I am finding it hard to move on as well but the sad thing is that life does go on, I don’t know the answer, just try and manage the best you can, day to day, sometimes I feel positive only for this sudden reality of my mum and dad no longer here. Just wanted to reach out to you and say you aren’t alone, I am sure with time things do and will get better. They have got to. All the best . X
Thanks for replying I'm struggling big time to the extent my health is being affected big time.
I feel at times what is the point sometimes just break down.It does not help that my stepdad still is fighting for something he thinks he is entitled to and cannot rest.This is what is dragging me down.
I really feel for you, honest I do. I was diagnosed with crohns in March, the consultant said it was most probably triggered by ‘life changing events’, death brings out the worst in people and your step dad sounds like he is showing his true colours, it’s ok to break down and it’s ok not to be ok, that’s what I tell myself, however as to what is the point, well there is a point, I cannot let this ruin my life, as heart braking as it is we still have a life to live, all be it terrible at the moment. Please, stay strong for your mum and dad, fight their corner, it’s easy to tell someone what to do but honest I’m living it as well. You will get through this. X
