My grandp was diagnosed with cancer last week. In 1 week he's gone from a fit able independent man to unable to walk and writhing in a bed in pain, to sleeping all day barely able to open his eyes.

My grandpa has been such a big figure in me growing up. My brother was very ill most of my childhood and my mum was away dealing with him most of the time so I was always at his and he was such a support and comfort. I've either always lived with him or he's been my next door neighbour for my first 20 years until I moved away to uni and I saw him every day until I moved away. He sent me such sweet texts and he was someone who I never doubted I was so loved by. I feel like I've taken being loved by someone so much for granted  

it is so hard to see him in such a condition and to see all my family so devastated. I am being very strong for them and haven't cried in front of anyone.

However I came back to my uni flat last night to work the weekend and I guess I just wanted some comfort from my flatmates (my closest friends at uni) and I got none of it. They made it abundantly clear that they've also lost grandparents and it's really not that sad and just how it goes with old people then the conversation topic was changed. It wasn't said exactly like that but it was hinted at and I knew exactly what they meant.

I don't feel like life won't be able to go on without my grandad, I understand he's an old man and he feels he's going to be joining my grandma and his daughter in heaven soon and he's pleased about that but it still does feel like such a painful and so so sad situation, i guess I just need some reassurance that I'm not silly to be so sad just now