Hi Everyone, My dad died last year at 58 of intersital Lung Diease he was the fittest man, he ate well and never smoked.He died at home with my mum suddenly last may.

We were all devastaed and worried about my mum, they were together since they were 16/17. She was going down hill and was sick allot, lost allot of weight and told us she was having these ''weird feelings''  and she had to try and breathe them away. The Dr said it was anxiety and maybe PTSD. This was not the case as she was given antidepressants and turned away, she asked the DR for a MRI scan and she thought there was more to it and she was told NO!. Eventually months of being sick and loosing 3st in weight she asked again and had to fight for one.

In July this year she had her scan and was called in the same day, my sister went with her, she was told she has a tumour which turned out to be a Glioblastoma GRADE 4 tumor and would have 4-6 weeks left, she opted for radiotherapy and had 2 weeks of this 3 times a week. This was meant to give her a little more time. She lasted 10 WEEKS  and myself , brother and sister gave her hospice care at home as she wanted to die in her own house.

This was so hard as we did everything for her, she ended up getting St columbus in 3 times a day in the last few weeks to help us with her personal care as moving her was causing pain, she got a driver in to help with this and we had to administer pain relief orally too.

The nights it was my turn to stay over were scary , i was worried 24/7 she would die as i was upstairs in bed. Eventually over the last 2-3 weeks she stopped eating, drinking and talking to us. It was awful seeing her like that. She passed away during the early hours of wednesday morning. She looked at peace, not longer in pain or discomfort.

Im so lost without her, she was my best friend the one i always turned too when ever i needed advice or help. I have waves where i feel nothing but numb ( ive been put on sleeping tablets and antidpressants to help me cope) Other days I cry and cry everytime I think about her, or see her picture or messages in my phone.

They say over time it eases but I dont know how ill ever cope not having a future without my mum in. The pain just thinking about life without her breaks my heart.

I have no parents now, I'm 35 a mum myself so im not a young person but to loose them both has really broken me. It doesnt feel real at all. I wish i could wake up and she would still be here.