Hi there ...

Well I think we learn to live without them ... but never stop missing them .. everyone grieves differently.. sometimes it's so hard to understand how others think or feel or grieve... I found younger ones that I've known, tend to fill time going out, having fun .. coz that stops "sad thoughts" from overwhelming them .. it's like a coping mechanism... 

I know when I lost my mum, and she was my best bud .. it was hard to talk to my sister's and close family, as they always teared up .. and I felt like I was making them sad ... but l learned slowly how to remember the funny things she'd say or do .. and slowly my young kids ... 8 and 16 learned it was o.k to think of those memories... and even now 33 years on, put her picture on their face book ... and now with my grandkids I told them how wonderful she was .. how much she loved her grandchildren.. and things she'd do with them ..

I told my beautiful granddaughter my mum leaves us feathers to remind us, she's looking down, and watching us .. it's like she's still here in a way .. it really does help bringing the ones we lost along with us .. they will always live in our hearts .. so I'd say go with your heart .. try little things at first like " dad would like that " or dad would be so proud" when they do something spiecial ... and if they see your remembering without being sad, they may just open up, and know it's o.k to mention him ..

It's so hard being a mum ... and wer always learning ... and I know those feelings of feeling alone in thoughts .. so hold on in there .. one step at a time .. and if they do open up, try just listening .. we can't take their pain away, but we can hold their hand ... and when they change the subject, go with the flow .. sending you a vertual hug.. Chrissie....