Hi all

i was just reading a forum thread on here about how traumatic watching someone die is. I completely agree. Maybe it's too soon for me to be posting this. But my grandad at the age of 81 died in my arms today in the hospital at 13:21pm. He had cancer, renal failure, sepsis among other things. I watched him slowly die over the course of a week. But today was the worst. I watched his breathing change, the death rattle come, his agitation. And this is all in 40 degree heat which didn't help (hottest day of the year). 
I was on my own when we passed. The rest of my family (mum, nan, sister) didn't want to see him in this way. I only turned 20 last week. The nurses seemed quite surprised I was on my own witnessing this. But he died in my arms. It sounds nice, peaceful. But it was far from that. It was so traumatic I don't think I'll ever be the same.