Hi there, 

I have also lost my mom 2 weeks before she turned 55 just 1st December 2021. I am slightly older than you, I am 33. 

After my loss, I started listening to grief podcast, that helped me a lot and which I highly recomend. I found those on Spotify and there is a huge variety to chose from. To name a few 'grief sofa','not so linear'. From there, you will gather more and more information on ways to help yourself goign through this terrible journey (other podcasts, recommended books, even movies or TV series etc)

Soon after, I started to learn that time won't heal grief or loss as everyone are saying. I found it harder day by day spent without my mom. Mom is one of the most important and closest people in your life and how can you NOT miss her every step of the way? She is your support system, therapist, friend, judge and so much more. Well at least she was in my case. And us being as young adults and facing so many important milestones ahead which we won't be able to share with our mothers hurst so bad. But learning more about grief and ways you can cope with this rollercoaster does help to get thorugh things. Keeping your mom close in your thoughts and building this new connection after she is gone physically, also helps me, as I do still talk to her... Talking to people who might have had similar experiences and sharing feelings is also very important. There is this huge grief community on instagram as well that might help you find a direction to cope easier. 

Also I kept on hearing about this grief community for young adults (ages 18-35) called 'let's talk about loss'. It is a group of people who went through the same we are going through. They share their experiences, pain, tears but also greatest memories, laughs together. Which sometimes might be exactly what is needed - to be understood. I reached out to them recently, so you might want to check them out as well. They do simple gatherings but also online chats and so much more. 

I know that the pain is real and it sucks really bad and some days it feels like a dead end. But some days are not. Some days are good and you are able to smile remembering your mom rather than bursting into tears, which does also happen by the way. But just know that there will be all sorts of different days and you won't necesserily be feeling this huge weight on your showlders all the time. 

Just try and find the ways that works for you and that eases the pain slightly. Stay strong and you can do it. Your mom would want you to keep your head high!