I can’t cope with this pain anymore

Hi everyone, 

I lost my dad over a year ago. I'm only in my early twenties. It's been a year and My heart hurts so so bad. Every night I cry, every time I'm alone I cry. My heart hurts for my mum and my siblings, and my children. He really was an amazing person, loved by everyone who met him. I just can't understand why it had to be him? There's so many evil people why did it have to be him? I'm really struggling to live without him. The only reason I'm still here is because I wouldn't ever want my children going through this pain that I'm feeling.

please someone tell me it gets better? Because I seriously see no way out of this heartache

  • I lost my mum a decade ago and still think about her every day. I was very much a "mummy's boy". The first couple of years were very hard. I was, and still am, especially distraught that she never got to meet my son, who is now 8. But I take some comfort in the fact she did meet the woman who is now my wife, and they got on great.

    It's very hard, I know. Try to think what your dad would want? He'd want you to think about him fondly, and talk about him, the good memories: holidays you had as a family, special occasions. But most of all he'd want you to spend as much time with your kids as possible, maybe telling them all about there grandad. In the wider family we still talk about my mum, and that's how it should be. And yes sometimes I still cry. And though I'm not religious (opposite in fact) I take some comfort from knowing that one day we will be together again in the void.

     

  • Hey thanks for replying. I'm really sorry about the loss of your mum, that is heartbreaking. I'm very lucky that my dad was able to meet my kids ( he was basically a father figure to them). Losing him has completely broken my children's hearts and I think that's what hurts me even more. My children like to talk about him all the time, so everyday we talk about memories, and about grandad (my dad). I know he would want me to be healthy, happy and getting on with things, and I really really try, I just can't seem to do it. I find myself acting 'normal' and going about my normal day, and then I get this kind of guilt come over me. I know he wouldn't want this and I'm trying my hardest but it just hurts you know? It just angers me that these beautiful souls get taken far to early and there's evil people out here still living without a care. 
    thanks for replying it means a lot x