Angry husband

Hello, my husband was diagnosed with cancer last year had operation and everything went well, unfortunately he now has secondary terminal cancer. Since starting chemo he is veru very angry. Not sleeping and anxious, im trying to understand but im always walking on eggshells. He is gotten controlling and spending so much money wr dont have. We had a big fight now as he was demanding and shouting at me. I told him i hate him. Of course i was just angry but now he says he wants everything split 50/50 in other words separately.  I wont apologise becuase the way he has treated me is horrible and im doing everything i can to  care for him. Please any advice. Thanks 

  • Hi there, my dad was diagnosed with colon cancer a few years ago and my mum went through similar to you, he got very angry and ungrateful at times especially when my mum was looking after him so tirelessly. I think being diagnosed and told you're terminal must be vert frightening for him and of course your husband is hitting out on those closest to him as a coping mechanism. Of course he doesn't mean it and obviously deep down will be so greatful to have you caring for him. He knows he's loved and safe in your care. We always hurt the ones we love first I think. 
    the good news is that my dads cancer was stage 3/4 and he survived. Lots of bumps in the road but he made a full recovery and is awaiting a stoma reversal. 
    Please don't give up on your husband stage 4 doesn't mean the end. There are lots of positive survivor stories on here. 
    Sending love to you and your husband x

  • Hiya

    My son gets angry and shouts Ive hidden his cash card as he was spending and ordering but couldnt remember when I mentioned this to the palliative team they explained that the anger is normal and is made worse by anxiety I dont know if this will help youbut he was prescribed regular Diazapram  and Larzapram  for when what he calls red mist starts   Its helped him loads  I know everyone  is different by might beworth a chat with his care team 

    Good Luck x