Both my parents

What an absolute crap year :( in March my mother was diagnosed with grade 2 breast cancer and has asities. That was drained and all seems to be going well at the moment. She is only on letrozole because of other health issues but the cancer has reacted to it and it has shrunk by half! But newly diagnosed (2weeks) is my dad who has stomach cancer and asities also. The cancer is now advanced has spread and the asities is now malignant aswell as the lining of the stomach. The opening of the stomach has now closed so is on a tpn tube because of vomiting and unfortunately is still vomiting. A referral has just been made and the palliative team came to visit today. It's all gone down hill in the last 2 weeks. He's been in hospital for 8 weeks now with what we thought was just a burst stomach ulcer. It's all happening soo fast and up to now we have not been given any time frame.  I'm now scared he is slipping away soo quickly. It still hasn't hit home I feel numb  

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    Hi Kate,

    A very warm welcome to the forum that nobody wants to join. It is hard enough to cope with one member of the falily having a diagnosis of cancer, but to have two really is a double whammie! I am glad to hear that your mum has responded to Letrozole and seems to be doing well. It sounds as if your dad is your priority at present.

    Have you spoken openly to the doctors who are looking after him? You might find it helpful to get the family to draw up a list of questions, then ask to speak to a doctor. It can be helpful to be totally open with him/her. You are unlikely to be given a time frame unless you ask the question outright and really want to know. Even then this is only a 'guesstimate', as we all go in our own time.

    Having been through a similar situation myself, I feel for you. You will find the strength to get through this and are in my thoughts and prayers.

    Please keep in touch and remember that we are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx

  • Hi Kate,

     

    First of all, I want to apologise for the horrible year you have had so far, I can only hope that your mum and dad keep fighting. 
     

    I would love to say I know how you feel, of which to some degree I do but no ones experience with cancer is the same. 
    in January my dad got diagnosed with Chronic Myeloid Leukemia, it felt and still does like my world has crashed and I've been on pause since then.

    Unfortunately it didn't stop there. On the exact same day both my mums parents got diagnosed with cancer. My papa was diagnosed with renal cancer that had spread to his lung, which he had the upper right section surgically removed yesterday. And my nanny was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer, with 2 months, she is currently on chemo trying to shrink the tumour that has wrapped around an artery and crushed her intenstine shut so she cannot eat. 
     

    What I've learnt the past 9 months, is that it is ok to feel all of the emotions you feel, and if anything it is absolutely crucial to spend time with your loved ones that have fallen ill. I spent the first couple months of this year completely numb, I understand how you feel. 
     

    You're doing your best and I can guarantee your parents are so grateful to have you by their side through this. 
     

    Please don't get swept away by this, it is difficult emotionally and mentally, but you've got this :)