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End stage and he wants to discuss everything with everyone

Snoopy6691
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Evening all

OH is end stage lung cancer. We have always talked frankly and openly together about everything, all ducks in a row so to speak

But lately he is fixated on telling our close family and friends what he wants for his funeral, the details of our finance and how ok I'll be for money, the fact that he wants me to go travel and visit all the places we planned to do when he retired next year. 

I find it hard to listen again and again. The kids (30 and 28) know I;ll be ok bt dont need to know where every penny is. He asked a friend today to say a few words when hes gone at the party we've all to have a few months after

Is this normal???   Its just So hard for everyone. He is only 59 and a non smoker so the Lung cancer is extra hard to take, but........

Thanks all

x

  • Hello Snoopy6691

    I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling with all that's going on at the moment. People cope in many different ways when they're facing death. It sounds as if he maybe wants to reassure your children that you will be OK and that he wants those around you to support you with whatever you have planned for the future. It may be that talking about things is what helps him to cope with what's going on and give him some reassurance too. 

    I can understand that it must be hard to hear this same thing repeatedly; it brings it all home time after time. 

    I don't know if you've anyone that you can talk with about how you're feeling Snoopy? It often helps to have somewhere safe to be able to offload how you're feeling about things. If you'd like to chat with one of our nurses you're most welcome to call them on 0808 800 4040, Monday to Friday 9 am to 5 pm. You might also like to have a look at the information on our website about caring for the carer. 

    I do hope that you find some support to help at this difficult time. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator 

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