Hi there ... so so sorry your going through this heartbraking time at the moment.... cancer at its crulest ... i have some expieriance of what your going through ... and although every situation is different ... i can only tell you what helped me and my situation ...

Looking at everything is overwhelming... it sends every cell to scream on how to get through ... so what I did was take a deep breath ... lots of deep breaths ... stop looking at everything ... prioritise all your thinking about ... and deal with one thing at a time ... sort things as and when they pop up ... try not to do the "what  ifs " .... live in the day ... take time to escape ... get out ... even for an hour ... do something completly "normal" weather its listening to music ... going for a walk ... anything ... and leave your thoughts back there ... pick them up when back ...

Listen to each other ... it's o.k to share tears... to admit your both scared ... to hug and even smile if something happens to make you do that ... know your not super woman ... your just human ... don't try to get everything perfect ... you will make mistakes ... we all do ... 

Reach out ... call Marie Currie and they are there for your situation ... and for families going through this .. accept others help if offered ... or you will break doing everything ... and lastly know lots of us on here have been where you are now ..you can vent .. or ask advice ... or just get feelings off your chest ..

Sending a vertual hug.... Chrissie x x 

Thank you Chris's 

this has helped me no end.

Hes changed today & in my heart I think the time is near not that I know what to expect are there any tell tell signs ~ crikey this is just unbelievably hard to deal 

xx

Hi there ...

So glad it helped a tad ... if only we never had to go through this ... but done the right way, helps you look back without regret ... so trust your heart ...

Every situation is different ... but in my situation... they slept most of the time ... over a few days ... stopped eating ... then drinking ... so we got a flavoured water and cotton bud and wet her lips ... we talked to her as we learned the hearing is the last thing to go ... so we were very careful about what was said around her ... sometimes it looked like she could see someone or say a few words to those we lost ..  May be ... just maybe they were waiting for her ... we made sure she had enough pain meds if she looked in pain ... we held her hand lots ... we said all that was in our hearts ... hoping she heard..

Some go quickly and gently ... some fight it and it can be painful to watch ... as long as your prepaired for anything , it will help you through ... but getting all those saying good bye holding each other's hand will mean a lot ...and I'm sure we never loose those we love ... we just hold them in our heart and take them with us through life ... and know they are just through a door waiting for when it's our turn ... I'm sure he'd be well proud of you ... 

You will have a rollercoaster of emotions over the next year or so ...up and positive and crash down and cry ... but know, so so many know this time ... know your never alone ... I lost 7 family members in 14 months ... and know how hard trying to stay above the waves that come ... but in knowing we will see them again one day ... and living as they would want us to helps ... I'm here if you need a chat ... so hold on in there ... sending you a vertual hug... Chrissie x 

Oh gosh you are so comforting 

I am feeding Kev thru a peg & constantly giving him his meds/drinks feeds etc so I do that going

hes very sleepy today but we have managed to chat which is so lovely. He also wants to constantly hold my hand. 
 

Thanks Chrissie for taking time for me xx

Chrissie

He says he feels a bit better today but I've noticed he forgets things that we have discussed only half hour ago

Is this normal? 

It's all so upsetting to watch all this isn't? 

Hi there ..

Please know I'm not qualified... just life experience ... too much I'm sorry to say ... but from what I know .. nothing is normal .. anything can happen ... we just went with the flow, and anything we wernt sure about, we asked people with far more expierance, like Marie Currie and they often had advice or answers as they live with this daily ... go on their website and get their number ...

In my opinion I'd say it's sounds like my sister, who in those last days went nearly totally back to wanting to go home to our mum and dad, who'd we lost 30 years ago .. she wanted mum and we went along with that .. saying mum would be here soon ... we went into her world ... where ever that was at the time ... 

So all I'd say, is go with him on this last journey.... keep holding his hand ... don't tell him he's been told or say anything he thinks is wrong ... go into that world and know he won't feel alone or scared .. and at the end of the day ... know, like I've already said ... your just doing the best you can .. your not super human .. 

I just so hope you have a relative or buddy to hold your hand too .. but I'll be here while you need a shoulder ... you can do this ... your stronger then you know ... braver then you think ... and loved by the one who's hand your holding ... Chrissie x x 

Thank you

I know deep in my heart that it won't be long now. 
 

St Claire's Hospice is coming around this afternoon so will have a good chat with them xx 

Chrissie so much love ️ to you x