Hey Busby666, 

I'm gonna keep this short and sweet... if you feel like you need more info, call his cancer care nurse or start calling the consultants secretary to get a call back and get your questions answered... Write down all your questions fist so you don't miss anything and then get on the blower and annoy the *** out of people till you get your answers.

Lynsey 

Hi Busby,

This must be an awful situation for you both. I agree with Aggie's advice, start asking questions and you should get some answers. Many people don't want to know what is happening at this stage, so you don't always get the answers you want unless you ask direct questions.

Wouldn't it be great if we could all get a holiday from cancer?

Thinking of you both.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Hi Lynsey 

Thankyou for your message you are right what you say.

Today Ian has took really poorly he has been took into hospital 

Surprise surprise  no answers again a stupid doctor actually phoned me from outside A and E to basically ask me what was going on with my husband and does he have a DNR I was horrified they was never any mention of any problems with he's heart 

To cut a long story short they moved him up to a ward put him on antibiotics drip because they THINK ! He may have a perforated bowel he also has a kidney stone which they missed this is the second one in 3 months 

They have no answers where we go from here they did say he woudnt be a canadite for surgery no reason why 

I have just sent a really long email to the cancer nurse  the one who apparently is always at the end of the phone lies ! I have had a message sent to the ongulist aswell

I have said in my email u want answers and I want to know that they have give my husband any treatment he can have  to help with pain management him been able to eat

I also said I will make sure he gets every chance at having what time we have left in comfort 

I will make sure of this I'm not going to give up on him 

I really need to make a complaint about this whole situation and I will do that 

Hi Busby,

Bless you! The way you are feeling is perfectly normal. You are naturally scared stiff and I don't blame you. Have you had any word from the nurse or the oncologist yet? All you can do is to be there for your husband, to make sure that he is comfortable and that his painis well controlled. Sadly, you will find that he is likely to eat and eventually drink less the nearer he comes to the end.

You might find it helpful to write down a list of all the things you want to know, as it's all too easy to forget an important question in the heat of the moment. In the meantime cherish the time that you have left, instead of worrying about what will eventually happen. Takes things a day at a time or an hour at a time if need be. The whole picture is just too much to cope with at the moment. 

Thinking of you and willing you the strength to see this through.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx