Struggling

So I posted about my mum being diagnosed with liver, lung and bone cancer. Apparently a nurse visited her at home and told her, when visiting her oncologist to "act well" to ensure she gets treatment. Seriously... She's really weak, barely eating and the pain management is making her really sick. 

She had an appointment this week with her oncologist and has said she was too ill to go. We said that was ok as it was just a chat but she's now decided she doesn't want the biopsy which is scheduled next week and is refusing treatment. Chemo really made her ill last time but is there anything else? The nurse is looking at energy drinks and steroids to try and "build her up". 

My dad is struggling managing the situation and isn't eating properly either (him cooking makes her feel ill, so he doesn't). He's type 2 diabetic so that's not doing him.much good either.

Can anyone offer any kind of advice or support? It sounds like she's given up, and when I try and ask whether there's other treatment or whether she's spoken to her oncologist, rather than the nurse, she says she's too tired and she can't cope with it all. She shuts down and won't talk. Any advice? 

  • Hello Comfytibble

    I'm sorry to hear about your Mum's diagnosis and the situation that you find yourselves in. It sounds as if your Mum is feeling very overwhelmed by it all and that may be why she doesn't want to talk. Would she be agreeable to you speaking to the nurse or Oncologist about things? Even if your Mum decides that she doesn't want any kind of treatment, it's important that the team are able to make her as comfortable as possible and they may be able to adjust her pain relief so she doesn't feel so nauseous. 

    You may find it helpful to have a chat with one of our team of nurses. I'm sure they would be happy to offer any advice, support, and information that they're able to. If you would like to speak to them, they're available Monday to Friday from 9 am to 5 pm on 0808 800 4040. 

    I hope that things improve for you all soon. 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator