A family member has been diagnosed with neuroendocrine cancer.. there are multiple tumours and metastasis inc to the liver, and is being classed as grade 2 stage 4. No prognosis has been given. We are two years into this diagnosis and in Dec 19 a bowel obstruction caused by one of the tumours resulted in an emergency right hemicolectomy.

There has never been an acceptance of the diagnosis other than a " I'm going to die soon" attitude... an alcohol problem has now become a 1litre of vodka in every 24hr period problem. They are making themselves even more ill than they would be with the cancer and have convinced themselves the vodka eases pain and helps with anxiety and daily ablutions. The docs know but aren't doing anything to help or support other than reiterate that the drinking should stop. There are now symptoms which could be the cancer or could be the drinking. I'm sure there is a yellow tinge to the skin, urine is dark, feet swell, constant fatigue, insomnia and intermittent diarrhoea/constipation and nausea. I'm not allowed to speak to the docs, I get the impression that even though they are scared, they want to be in control of how things end? I'm living with this and it's hell. Due to lockdown we haven't seen a doc for 15 months and have had two telephone consultations but no blood tests or urine markers. I've accepted their choice now after many months of anger and bitterness. I watch everyday for signs of deterioration but every day is different with highs and lows. I'm getting depressed myself but in their eyes it is only they who are going through anything. Their selfishness overwhelms me yet I try and still show empathy yet little I do is acknowledged or appreciated.