Mum

Hi, how do people get support for looking after their parents with advanced cancer? Covid is obviously making things much worse, such as palliative care, I do 3 hours in a morning, give her support with meds clean up ect. The minute she's awake and has her meds she's back asleep again, we was told 6mnths left, but am struggling with this as all this has happened during covid but Infront off family am acting I can cope 100%

  • Hi there ..

    If you call McMillan they have financial services there that can advise you .. I'm pretty sure your get carers if you do a certain amount of hours a week ... anyone on palitive care can apply for pip too and if it's advanced like it sounds .. it can be fast tracked ... at least then you should be able to get the help you need .. Marie Currie is another organisation that can offer practical help and advice ...

    Unfortunately it's not automatic .. tyou have to apply .. but McMillan should help filling in forms too .. ask if it can be backdated as you didn't know and you've been doing this with no help ..

    Good luck .. let us know how it goes so I can pass on the info ... I'm no expert ... just bits I've picked up along the way ... chrissie x

  • It's not the money that's the problem, it's the turning the key in the door how will she be? Has she been sick some more, has she managed to eat. It all floods back from when I helped my nana, I wasn't very close with my nana she was on my dad's side and it hit like a ton off bricks I spent every day helping her, my mam is different, well mainly because she is my mam, she's meeting a nurse next week. She's in constant pain with her back, stomach and now she's been told it's also in the brain, I know how to do palliative but both situations are different and il learn on the way but I'm struggling with the right information, am finding all this rather hide behind close doors 

  • Hi ..

    I'd still give Marie Currie a ring... they can help you with advice ... or practical help ... write down your questions .. they deal with these sort of situations all the time .. x

  •  

    HI Lo_oops,

    You've done the hard part, which is admitting that you need help.

    I got my GP to fast track me to a social worker when I was in a similar position. She was marvellous/ She came out on a Friday afternoon and had everything arranged to be in place the following Monday. She arranged for a hospital bed to be delivered along with some additional aids. She also arranged for carers to come out to tend to her personal needs 4 times a day. This meant that the time we had together was of a better quality, as I wasn't constantly washing the patient, cleaning up, distributing medication or coaxing her to eat or drink, etc.

    There is another option which you might want to consider and, this is something that the hospital can arrange for you. This is getting her a place in a hospice, if she is not insistant on staying at home. We resorted to this last year for my father-in-law and he was really well looked after for his short time there. This was all arranged within 2 days. I know that there can be a long wait for a bed in some areas, but i think that we were just fortunate that there was a space at the time.

    I am so sorry that you find yourself in this position and hope that you manage to get some help soon.

    Please keep in touch. We are always here for you.

    Kind regards,

    Jolamine xx