Dad diagnosed with cancer

My dad was diagnosed with lung cancer yesterday. I've gone through the full range of emotions from utter sadness to anger that he has so much to live for and so little time...

 

I didn't think that I'd feel as lost as I am; I'd really welcome advice from anyone who has been through this.

 

Thank you.

 

 

  • Hi,

     

    I'm sorry that your dad was diagnosed with lung cancer. My dad has had Lymphoma for years. We didn't think he would live long because he also has heart failure. He still walks a few miles a day but will always have cancer. I hope he can start treatment soon and responds well. 

  • Hi Pd204,

     

    So sorry to hear about your dad. My dad was diagnosed in February this year with bowel cancer, which had spread to his liver. It's not curable but he is being treated to shrink the tumours. Like you, I've gone through all the different emotions. He has been having chemo every 2 weeks and although it's been a struggle for him, he has recently heard from his consultant that his blood results are greatly improved and they are pretty confident that the treatment is working. He is now waiting for a scan to hopefully confirm this. We don't know what the next steps will be and it been an awful few months but he is here and fighting and it has brought my family even closer together. Stay strong for your dad.

  • Thank you so much for taking the time to write. I really appreciate your time. I will keep strong for my dad.

  • Thank you so much for your message. It really gives me hope.

  • Hi Pd204,

     

    Sorry to hear about your dad's diagnosis. It's a tough time. I lost my dad a year ago to metastasis cancer of the liver. We had very little time to prepare.

     

    Have they told you what the prognosis is. Try to inform yourself as much as you can. My Dad's diagnosis was a complete bolt out of the blue. Find out all the facts, treatments available and of course speak with your Dad about it. I find, looking back on things now, we didn't face up to Dad's illness. We avoided talking about it but he wanted to talk about it and we would talk about it onlywonly he raised the topic. In hindsight I wish id spoken more to my Dad about how he was feeling, discussed things more openly with him. Unfortunately any treatment was too late for Dad but you may have options. 

     

    As scared as you're feeling, you need to set it aside and be there for your Dad. It was such a struggle for me visiting my Dad. I just wanted to hide in my house and pretend it wasn't happening. Of course I also didn't want to show how scared and heartbroken I was infront of Dad. I tried to be strong but looking back I'm asking if that was the right approach. Did it come across as not caring. Grief is a funny thing. Everything gets turned around on its head. Things I said or did take on a new unintended meaning. 

     

    Speak to someone. Even chatting on here helps. It's always good to talk to people who understand.

     

    Take care of yourself. 

  • Hi,

    I can totally relate to your situation. You need to stay positive and believe that he will live a long life. 

    Your dad would have soo many different emotions at this time and everyone needs to give as much support but at the samre time givng him space to gather his own thoughts. 

     

    Turn your feeling of lost into giving your dad as muvh as you as possible , he will really appreciate that.

     

    Look at all lines of treatment and challenge the consultants if you are unsure about anything.

     

    good luck and stay strong.

    GOD IS GREAT

  • Thank you so much for your advice and support.

     

    It is very much appreciated.

  • Thank you so much for your kind words.