Hi, sorry to hear about your Dad, I lost my husband 2 months ago to oesophagus cancer, it is a scary time for everyone.  my husband spent a week in hospital shortly before he went, then two weeks in the hospice before coming home for the last couple of weeks. Toughest time of my life (and my children). The hospice was probably more support for us and a nicer environment for us all then the hospital, the children and I were allowed to stay and even bring our puppy. He was determined to come home though and strong enough to make it as easy as possible for me and his mum to look after him at home with the children there too ( he was crawling down the hall to the toilet the day before he died when he couldnt walk so he wouldn't be a nuisance for us!). Not many people,  especially older, would be able to manage that I think. We found hospice an improvement on hospital as it was more like a home environment then hospital but nursing care and expertise was still at hand. They let him come home despite how sick he was as that is what he wanted, but he ( and they) needed reassurance that we would manage ok. They taught me to administer his pain meds through a syringe driver and didnt let him go until we were confident.  the emphasis was on what the patient wanted, they needed to make sure he was happy to come home and have just me and his mum caring for him, otherwise they would have kept him in. Its important the patient is feeling safe. Is he able to swap to the hospice instead if he is not feeling ready to come home? It's a tough one but he needs to feel confident he will receive the care he needs, and may be worried about being a burden to you. The hospice also have people in for respite care to stabilize and feel more confident before coming home,  maybe that us an option for you. Or if not, make sure the hospital go over and over how to do his feed so you (and he) are not worried about it going wrong, especially if you think he really wants to come home but is nervous about it. I found the hospice more patient and supportive with teaching us stuff then the hospital were if you have that as an option.  Don't be afraid,  you can learn to do things you had no idea you were capable of, but try and get to the bottom of what he really wants...xx

Hi thanks for the reply sorry to hear about ur husband x 

My dad came home the Wednesday morning he's doing well but he just looks poorly everyday. Where doing everything for him including his feeds and giving him water threw the NG tube. Just spending as much time with him as possible I know he's not gonna get any better x 

I'm glad he made it home with you all, hope they are making him comfortable, all you can do is give him your time and love, he knows you are there and you care about him. It's a very tough time though...xx