My brother needs help

Hi all I need advice . My brother has agressive oral cancer. He is struggling with eating , even with the esure 2 cals his nurses have given him. He is at home as refuses a nursing home. He had a bad experience in a nursing home where spent 2 weeks in respite , he wasn't happy there. I have asked him to go a&e or even to the head & neck clinic but refuses saying I'm not sitting around for hours. We are both thinking the worse. He had head & neck scans plus liver scan just over 2 weeks ago with no results yet. Everything I read is don't forse patient to eat drink just make them comfortable. This is very difficult to watch, I work, I'm the the bill payer at my own home so I cant stay with him for as long as I'd like, I pop back and forth inbetween jobs,  He refuses carers,  I'm at a loss any advice would be appreciated I hate seeing him this way its breaking my heart,  he just seems to be excepting of his situation. I would love him to be somewhere they can make him comfortable. He I think is waiting on the scan results.

  • I am sorry to hear about your brother. Have you thought about him going to a hospice for a week or so for some respite? A lot of people think that you only go to a hospice for end of life care but they also help people get their pain under control and build them back up so that they can go home. The environment is alot nicer than a hospital or nursing home and the nurses are great. 

    Take care 

    Georgina 

  • Thank you I've just spoke to his community McMillan nurse she said a hospice wont take people in for respite anymore. She is getting help for my brother. He isn't happy with me though. Tells me I've no right to speak to his nurse. I'll no doubt be trouble when I see him. But at least something is being done..

    thank you for replying