Lack of information

Hi there. My dad (aged 72) was diagnosed with terminal prostate cancer, and has been given a T4 'classification' for want of a better word. Sadly I don't live near my parents, and only manage to see them every other month, but between me and my sisters, we get snippets of information, and between us we try to get a picture of exactly what's happening with trestment, meds etc. I personally think that my parents are both confused (not in a dementia way, but just overwhelmed with information) but also they think they are protecting us from the reality of a terminal diagnosis. Will the Macmillan nurses answer questions from me and my sisters if my dad gives his permission, and how do I go about organising?  Any help would be appreciated. Thanks

  • Hello J-jo1970

    I'm sorry to hear that your Dad has prostate cancer. It's difficult when you're not able to fully understand what is going on for Dad at the moment and a chat with his specialist nurse could be a positive thing for you all. It may help you and your sister to gain a clearer picture of what is going on for Dad at the moment. 

    He would need to give his permission for the nurse to speak to you so it would seem sensible in the first instance to have a chat with your parents and check that they are happy to do that. Then you might decide between you all that they want to write a note for the nurse which they can take to the next appointment or it may be that your Dad is able to call and speak to the nurse about arranging for the two of you to chat. 

    I'm sure that the nurse will have spoken to patient relatives before so hopefully once those initial conversations take place it will all go smoothly. 

    I hope this helps but if you'd like to speak to one of our nurses for some advice, do give them a call on 0808 800 4040 (Monday to Friday 9am to 5pm). 

    Best wishes, 
    Jenn
    Cancer Chat moderator