Hi Mymumisawarrier....just didn't want it to go unanswered. Your Mum and yourself sound formidable! I don't know how your Mum's end will come, but I can say that I will always be grateful that my Mum was able to end as herself....and that the morphine pump really helped with that as once she'd had enough she was able to trust the doctors and nurses who had promised her no pain, and taken away her deep fear of the ending....

Hi Mymumisawarrior,

we are going through something similar with my dad, he was diagnosed with SCLC in Oct last year, had chemo which finished in Jan, he was clear then a new tumour in March...

anyway it's been a really rough few months but it's now spread to his bones and the doctors have given him 3 months.. he's been in a lot of pain for a while, it's been horrible to watch...

we are obviously devastated but are trying to be strong for him.

I hate that SCLC chats seem to go cold so firstly I wanted to check in and say your mum sounds like an absolute warrior. She has fought it so hard which I think on this formum we know is not easy. And secondly know if you have any advice?

all the very best to you and your family

xx

Hi JoJoC, I know it can be hard putting up such personal stuff on a site. And especially when so many people have not been able to be with their loved ones towards the end recently....I didn't have to face that, for which I am truly grateful. The only bit of advice I can offer is that you should permit yourself to read his messages about where he's at now. My mum raged for a while, then was unbelievably resigned and 'noble', then frightened again, then finally just tired. At the end she genuinely had got to the end of her strength, and we couldn't want her to hang on losing more and more of herself....Nothing makes it easier, but knowing she was ready to go did help...The astonishing thing about the palliative care was that it gave real quality of life in those last few months - and I will always be grateful for the care which the hospice gave her, nurses, doctors, specialists, cleaners, therapists, receptionists, cooks ....they were all so kind to us and to her. The only other thing I would say is that in all probability no decisions you made will have changed the situation - there's a whole area of life which is out of our control, all we can do is try to ride whatever wave we get landed with....so be kind to yourselves too....