My mom's advanced colon cancer

Hello,

My mother was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer with mets to the liver and peritoneum (abdomenal area?). She has been in hospice for 6 months and was just extended another 6 months. My mom is getting weaker, which she blames on old age. She is taking more pain killers, which she says helps to calm her nerves. She is having memory problems and is very foggy in her thinking, which she says is due to old age. She's not ready to die and kind of denies her symptoms.

I've read about advanced colon cancer but when I ask the nurses what I should expect and when, they are very vague. I know that no one has a crystal ball that can predict the future but I don't know anyone who has gone through this so I just don't know what to expect, what to look for, and what to plan for. I'm sure someone here has experienced something like this with a loved one. Can you tell me what you noticed as the days advanced and what milestones you noticed so that I know what to look out for?

Thank you in advance for any words of wisdom.

  • Hello yvonneg, 

    I am so sorry to hear about your mum and that she has been in hospice for 6 months. It must be really hard for you to watch her go through this and seeing her in denial of her symptoms. Unfortunately as you rightly pointed out it is impossible to know exactly how things may develop for your mum which is probably why the nurses were unable to be very precise about to expect as it also very much varies from one person to another. 

    We do have some detailed information on our website on advanced bowel cancer which you can read on this page and which I hope will be useful to you. 

    I am sure you will meet others here who have also looked after a loved one with advanced colon cancer and it certainly helps to chat to others who understand what you are going through at the moment. I found for example this thread by [@sodes]‍ who also wrote about his mum's advanced colon cancer a few months ago and may be a good person for you to talk to. There are so many others on this forum too who have been in a similar situation and hopefully they will be along soon to share their experience with you. 

    Finally, our nurses are only a free phone call away on 0808 800 4040 - their line is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm if you wanted to talk things through with them.

    Best wishes, 

    Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator