We've just found out that my hubby has small cell prostate cancer which apparently is quite rare and very aggressive, it's already spread to his liver, lung and spots around the area of the prostate. The oncologist told us today that he doesn't think chemo will be any good for him (he's 85) that it would be best to try and get him over his chest infection, pain free and let him do whatever he wants for the next few weeks/ possibly months.
We found out April 18 that he had a very enlarged prostate and a high PSA. The consultant told us that most people his age die with it rather than because of it. In November 18 he had laser surgery but was in more pain and discomfort than before the surgery. He was due to have TURPS in May 19 but the pre-op flagged up a high liver count so he was sent for a liver ultrasound but it was unclear. On the late may bank holiday we ended up in A&E because he had pains in his lower abdomen, they did a CT and later we were told the news. In the last 3 weeks everything seems to have happened so quickly, liver biopsy on 14th june then last friday our surgery sent a paramedic out because he had the abdo pain again but they seemed to think he was just constipated and gave him Cosmocol. Then in the early hours of tuesday morning he was in pain so i called an ambulance. He seems to have gone downhill so quickly, the weight has just dropped off him, his voice is barely audible anymore and his appetite is almost non existant. Just last month he was painting at the local cricket club, cutting a neighbours grass, climbing in the loft and going out shopping. He's always been a very independant person and doesn't like being cooped up.
How can i best help him? we've been asked if we have carers and support but it's not something we've ever needed. I'm a lot younger and still working, obviously i want to spend whatever time he has with him and although i've been told by my boss not to worry about work, i still feel i'm letting everybody down and creating more work for them. I just want to be there for my hubby.
