Firstly, I am so sorry your daughter has this rare cancer especially at her young age. Also thoughts and prayers go out to you, your family and her friends at this difficult time.

All I can do is to listen, even if you're having a really bad day or a great day or if you just want to say hi and talk about something other than your daughter's illness or your feelings. As parents all we want to do is help our children and be there for them 24/7 especially during this emotional time. But I've always been of the understanding that if you don't look after yourself first then how can you look after them.

A little background, in 2014, my husband of 25yrs then was diagnosed with neck cancer, stage 1. It was very fortunate we found the lump very early as he was shaving one morning. At first glance I had pointed this out to him but he said its nothing. I asked if he was feeling ok and he said yes. A week later, I noticed the lump had grown a little bigger so I made an appointment for him to see our GP. Long story short, it all happened so quickly. August 2014  seen GP, and had hospital appointment and confirmed neck cancer. Operation September, 24 lymph nodes removed, 4 cancerous. Radiotherapy treatment 6 months from Nov. Fast forward 2019, he has been clear. I had no support from family as they are all in NZ. But relief came from Cancer Support, our kids and some of our friends. My husband didn't want to burden anyone with his illness. But the emotional rollercoaster at the time was exhausting for me but somehow you find the strength to work through it, one day at a time. I kept telling myself, I'm the healthy one, you're the one not sick and have to go through the treatment. Be gentle and kind to yourself,  its okay to have a cry, be angry, frustrated, impatient. These are very normal emotions but when you've done with it, wipe your tears, brush yourself off and start again. So I am here to listen.

Kind Regards

Rita

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to me , firstly I’m so glad your husband is doing well now and thank you for making me not feel alone in all of this I’ll definitely take you up on talking on this forum to u and others as I have no friends and my family  have gone from being a close famil to not being one since my mum died  of cancer 16 years ago so I hope being on this forum helps me be strong for my daughter   Thank you

Hi

You are not alone in this! Am more than happy to listen and chat on here if it helps you get through your day. Try and get some rest. Tomorrow is another day, sending positive thoughts.

Rita

Thank you

Thank you 

Hi how are you doing today?

Hope you and our daughter are doing ok today?

What did you get up to today?

Sending you positive thoughts and hoping you had a restful night? Today is another day.

Rita xox

Hi thanks for asking today has been ok  got stuck into some gardening  I find it very therapeutic, my daughter had chemo today and I found out today I can be a half match stem cell donor for my daughter the transplant people phoned me today , so that is good news that will probably take place in autumn when her chemo is finished and depending on if she is strong enough for the transplant ,hope your day has been ok

Hi this is amazing news! Hope all goes well for your daughter's chemo and that she'll be strong enough for this? So happy for you both.

Like you, I too find gardening therapeutic. In the middle of weed maintenance around our property. Just need it to stop raining so I can use the strimmer, lol. Hoping to plant some flowers this weekend so I can cover our grey wall, any suggestions?

Have a lovely day. Talk again soon, take care! Rita xx

Hi Rita as for suggestions for the garden I do cheat a bit I mix real flowers with fake flowers so it looks nice all year long lol but I do love lavender in the garden the  smell that comes from it when the wind blows is beautiful and the colour is lovely too , I’m taking my 4 year old granddaughter horse riding this weekend so looking forward to spending time with her she’s so funny , hope u have a good weekend keep in touch when u can