Today it was confirmed my darling husband has cancer of the voice box and tongue. He is already in hospital on a feeding drip, he is losing his voice, he is in pain, his throat is so sore. Its advanced, been there a while and I am feeling all of the above and scared. scared I will beark down and not be able to support him, scared he will see me scared, scared I will lose him. I am angry because he is the most caring persone, all his life he has given to others, and others have taken from him without thought or kindness., we have just moved to Scotland, Sep last year and are in middle of renovating an old cottage, always his dream to retire here and do this and now it may be snatched away from him. We have been with one another 11 years June 6th and I am greedy I want more, as much as possible. They will not operate but chemo and radiotherapy for 5 days a week, for 6 weeks. All this time he will remain in hospital, he has been in 12 days already while they try to ease the pain and build him up to be strong for the treatment, which we know will be brutal. If the treatment not work they will remove the voice box and part of the tongue. It has not spread, so I guess thats good, we know its not curable but they wont say what best case senario is regarding life after treatment. I dont want him to go through all this for nothing. I am scared, it took us so long to find one another and I fear I may lose him, I am 59 and he 69, we are all we have. Yes, I am scared and yes I want to shout, scream and cry and yes I do feel cheated, but cheated for him, he deserves better than this. Thank you for letting me write this down, it lets it out. My heart goes out to everyone here in all the forums... God Bless you all and heres hoping................
