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Mum suffering from anxiety after cancer treatment

Sophie53
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Hi,

I'm completely new here but in need of some advice.

My mum was diagnosed with breast cancer in April 2018 and has since had a mastectomy, chemotherapy and radiotherapy. The breast cancer itself has gone but unfortunately she now has some specks of cancer on her spine that need to be managed with both chemo and hormone tablets. 

She has been so strong throughout all of her treatment, but now that she is on these tablets she has become very anxious and has been suffering with insomnia. The lack of sleep is making her more anxious and she is trapped in a bit of a vicious circle. I'm not sure if this has come on as a side effect of the tablets or whether the enorminity of what she has been through has suddenly dawned on her. She's very relunctant to take anxiety medication and she doesn't seem to want to go to any support groups, so we're struggling to get her to think logically and try to help herself.

My family and I are at a bit of a loss of how to help her at the moment, so I'm wondering if anyone else has been in a similar situation or perhaps felt like this after their own cancer treatment?

Any advice would be a huge help. Thank you! 

  • Offline

    Hi Sophie, 

    Thank for posting

    It is weel known that once we have finnished out main treatment, and are not having to visit the hospital for radiotherapy, People can often feel like this. After the frantic times spent going to hospital to not having to go much at all ofter make a peson feel they are on their own now and this results in them becoming anxious. She is probably also feeling anxious about the remaing spots of cancer.

    Having cancer is a life changing experiance and I am not surprised to hear how your mother is feeling. But it also affects people like yourself too. You havent said how you have coped with the situation You need to look after yourself too. All you can do is to be there for her and tell her if she is worried about anything to talk about it for talking does help.

    Take care,best wishes, Brian.

  • Offline in reply to woodworm

    Hi Brian,

    Thanks so much for your reply.

    You're right. Now that she's not in and out of hospital constantly, it's given her more time to think about what she's been through. She has also had a lot of other things to deal with, outside of her cancer, so I think everything may be coming to a head. I agree that she is anxious about the remaining cancer and she is also worried about the side effects that these new tablets may bring.

    Thank you, I have been trying to take time for myself and to avoid getting stressed out but as you can imagine it's a lot easier said than done! She does know that we are all there for her, but she is of the mindset that she's putting people out and doesn't want to be a burden, which she absolutely isn't. We're trying to make her see that she needs to try and help herself so that she can try and get past this, but it's proving diffcult. 

    Sophie

  • Offline in reply to Sophie53

    Hi Sophie.

    I do know what you are both going through, Having been a patient myself with prostate cancer but have also lost twelve family member to cancer over the years, 

    I often feel it was harder being a carer than it was a patient for at least I fewlt i had some control over how I felt. it is so hard watching someon you love suffer from this indiscriminate disease. That why this site is so good for we can talk to people we will never meet in an honest and open manner and know that they understand. It helps us not feel so alone to know others have gone throught the same experiance. 

    Tacke care and if you want to talk there is usually someone on here who can help, Brian

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