I am 20 and two years ago my mum was diagnosed with stage 4 secondary Breast cancer after an initial diagnosis & all-clear 6 years before. It’s has spread to her bones (leg, back and shoulder) and other areas.

My family have been dealing with this for two years now but recently I have been struggling more and more. My Mum raised me and my sister as a single mother- she is the most incredible person I have ever met, she is incredibly brave and strong and the best mum you could get. When she was diagnosed I couldn’t bear to leave her side but now I am at Uni 3 hours away and I only see her every few weeks. She lives alone, while has the most amazing support network around her I feel so guilty and sad every second I am not there. 

She has had a course of chemo and is currently on a new medication. It is difficult because day to day she is fine- she has some pain but no real practical difficulty yet I know she is so sick. Also, she was originally given 2 years, which we’ve passed and so now I feel like I am counting down the days until something happens.

she is having regular scans and tests and it is currently more or less controlled- but I am really worried it is spreading. Recently her memory is deteriorating massively and she is often confused and so I am worried it’s may even have spread to the brain however there is no way of knowing at the moment as the scans are restricted to her abdomen and chest. 

Essentially, I really need help understanding the possibilities and while I know it varies massively person to person I just need tin know what might be going on. I am not ready to lose the most important person in my life and want to know if I should be home with her  or doing more- I feel so useless.