Hi rohin ...

Oh boy you sound like your on a fast fairground ride ... and it's not stopping and you feel sick, scared it'll never stop .. and must be thinking how the hxll do I get off ...

We all have "loose it" days ... days when it all seems like a big black hole ... cancer doesn't just effect those of us with it .. it's really hard and scary watching someone you love with it ... 

No wonder your digestion system is all over the place .. l think you've been too strong for too long .. now its boiling over and seems overwhelming ...men often want to FIX things ... in life there's some things no one can fix .. I'd say tell your body and your mind ... it's o.k to feel scared .. it's o.k to "loose it sometimes" .. we all do .. your not superman, just a man who's going through probly the worst time ever .. 

You have a chance to make more memories with your dad .. every day you have him is a bonus .. stop looking ahead .. concentrate on the day your in ... I bet there's lots you and dad need to talk about .. his memories of growing up .. how he met your mum .. is there something he still wants to do ..it's o.k to share tears... it's o.k to admit your all scared ... and it's o.k to laugh too .. tell him about your baby ... show him scans... that way you'll know he's seen it .. leave nothing unsaid ..

I lost my mum suddenly from a heart attack and had no chance to even say those things l want to tell her ... how amazing she was how proud I was to have had her for my mum ... you've got the chance I never had ... what I'd give for just one hour ...

I tell you this because now I'm on my cancer path ... and I'm grabbing every day by the short and curlies .. time is too precious to hold feelings in .. it helps no one .. and share your dad's journey with all holding hands ... walk it together .. it's the hardest thing we do.. but if you can do this, you'll look back and be pleased you didnt waste this precious time you still have ..  Chrissie

Thanks Chrissie,

Really apreciated, I know I'm lucky that I get a bit of closure with my dad and I get to talk to him about stuff, not everyone does so it's good, and in away I'm lucky in that respect.

Yeh were hoping to get a sex scan soon Hopefully and only tell my dad the baby sex or let him an anounce the sex.

Sorry to hear about your cancer, I hope your treatment is going well.

this ****** of a disease does put things in perspective and how important family and close friends in whatever shape or form they are come, because along with food and shelter they're all that matter really.

I'm seeing my dad again today, looking forward to giving him a hug. Glad you're doing the same with your family,

Thanks again

Robin

X

Hi there, 

I think how you're feeling is normal. You've had a stress overload and it's gotten too much. You definitely need some support just for you whether it's a bit of counselling or some anti anxiety meds temporarily etc... My dad just got diagnosed with terminal cancer (lungs, liver, nymphs) and it is horrific for us all especially him. I had a pain in my right side earlier and convinced myself I felt a lump and that it was liver cancer etc... But I know why I'm doing it and I think that's natural too. Everyone here is really supportive so I'm sure others will have more useful advice for you but I really hope you're ok. Xxxxx

Thanks, yeh I know it's an overreaction and probably normal with all the stress, feel better today, seen my dad and gave him a big hug and had a good chat.

Still really tough as is for everyone especially him and my mum, who is amazing.

Sorry to hear about your dad,

like me I hope you get some time with him

and he's not in pain, my dad at the moment is at home which makes a big difference for him I know, he hates hospitals which is understandable.

Thanks again,

Robin

Hi I can understand so well how you feel. My father died of cancer when I was only young and it is so hard. My partner now has terminal cancer and I was surprised by my response. Obviously all the usual things happened, but I also became convinced I might have bowel cancer. I spent over £2,500 to be checked out privately as I could not be convinced in any other way that I was ok. I reasoned, the doctors missed my partner's cancer, are they missing mine ? I had all the checks you can have on the colon and bowel and there was no trace of anything. I hope this helps you to see all of your thoughts are understandable and in dealing with them every day you are being so brave. I think what none of us hear enough is you are brave and if I could tell you that I would. Whether this helps you to address your fears or not you are so brave.

My doc is pretty good, and he thinks I had an infection and probably the adrenaline from stress is keeping it hanging around or a mild ibs, hoping this obviously. But I'm still going to be following up just in case.

Yeh up until now I've been luck with the whole death stuff and terminal illnesses in mine and wife's family.

 but it's really hit hard for everyone, I never really thought how hard these things can be on everyone, think I kind of blanked off the possibility these things can and do happen.

I'm sorry to hear about your partner, I hope you get some time and can do some of the things you want to, as someone earlier said, although extremely tough, you do get a chance to say all the things you wanted to which is one benefit rather than a heart attack etc.

Thankfully family and wife are amazing and so understanding,

It was good seeing my dad again yesterday he was in good spirits, had a few laughs.