Hello PeteMC; good on you for trying to help your friend - the ball is however very much in her court.  People react differently to this kind of diagnosis and sometimes they just find it too hard to cope with their feelings and don't want to share it with others.   Just send her a note saying you care for her but will of course accept her wish to close down the circle of people involved.  Tell her that you will be rooting for her and if she wants you to do anything at all to give you a call or send a message but you will not bother her if she does not want to  be contacted.  That is what I would do anyway; no recriminations or anything; just a note of unconditional goodwill.  Others may have different thoughts.  Annie