Thank you. Your thinking pretty much as mine.  "Practical" is my way of coping I guess - a need to feel in control of a situation that is fast running beyond ANYONE'S mastery. So....done basic rearrangement of downstairs to fit in a bed and accessories. While far from wealthy, I know it must be even more difficult for those with any added woes from financial restraints.

Onward and downward....

Oh my word, there's a lot going on for you. I can empathise, although my situation isn't the same. I had major surgery in February, given the all clear, told to report any concerns pronto. Then my husband suffered a stroke three weeks ago, while undergoing routine surgery.

Thankfully he came home after a spell in ITU then rehab. The hospital arranged for some additions to the house, like an extra rail on the stairs, bed rail, frames for the loos. He's working hard to regain as much movement as possible.

Before I knew how this year would pan out, I'd been looking at different properties. We've been here 20 years so a change seemed tempting. But since coming home from surgery, all I really want is familiar things.  Hubby feels the same. So we'll change a few items here to make life easier, and stick where we know the neighbours.

I'm glad your wife can stay being cared for while you get yourself sorted. Let off some steam when and where you can, like here perhaps. Life can be tough. Please accept a hug. Wish there was more I could offer.

Regards, gamechanger.

Thank you. "Tough" seems a bit of an understatement for both our situations right now. 

One day at a time sounds trite and simplistic, but actually pretty much covers I suppose.

Good luck.

Lol, I only put tough because we're not allowed to swear here. Yeah, one step at a time. Keep plodding on.

Thanks. Plodding on about does it, but we've never been much good at "plodding".

More practicalities ..... Any tips on how to press Medics for a prediction as to "how long?". I assume a "less than 6 months" notification for DWP purposes a fairly solid long-stop clue? (Not that I would put my wife through the reality crunch of actually claiming the money.)

Support at home almost equally unknown. Soc Care worker talked in generalities. MacMillan more substantive. But both of these likely to be of far more help if lived 1/2 miles down road in Nottingham City, Gedling Boro being worse than useless. 

As far as I can see I shall simply have to be at home 24/7. Doable but not ideal. 

When/if comes to end game hospices are thin on the ground round here. Do purely private ones exist? Will they take anyone (at a price, obviously)?

Any and all advice welcomed. Thanks. 

Hello again,It might be better to start a new thread with a different title, you may get more responses.

It must be so difficult for you not knowing a timescale, I think doctors don't always know so they can't answer the question unfortunately. Your mind must be in a whirl with one thing and another.

Off the top of my head, have you considered renting a small place in a different area if the services are better?

Can your GP surgery offer any pointers on help available?

Citizens Advice should have plenty of information.

Sometimes hospices can offer support and advice if asked.

Best wishes, gamechanger