hi everyone, I’ve never posted on here before but thought I might find it a bit therapeutic..

my dad was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer last January and was given 12-18 months to live. In the June, my long term boyfriend proposed and we set the date for 27th April this year, hoping Dad would still be well enough to make it. Up until January this year Dad was doing fine and I had no doubt he would make it for the big day. However about 5 weeks ago he got really poorly and was so tired all the time. We hoped this was just flu and would pass but last week we ended up calling an ambulance and Dad went into hospital. We’re now 5 weeks away from the wedding and I’m beside myself. Even if he does survive until the wedding I’m not sure he could make it in the State he’s in. Postponing the wedding really isn’t an option for me, but it breaks my heart to think I’m either going to have lost my dad by then or have to leave him in hospital while I get married. I feel so selfish even thinking about what I do for my wedding and the fact I’m supposed to go on a 2 week honeymoon straight after, when obviously the worst bit is potentially losing my dad but I’m really struggling to think straight.