my father is suffering.. he is dying

i am not so good in English but still i want to type here my feelings my pains just everything. i am 18 years old.  my father is the best one.  he always cared for me.  he gave me everything whatever i wanted. i love him so much..  right now i am crying and still typing..  i am in the first year of my graduation and i had never thought that this would happen to my father..  he was a healthy person but now i dont know what diseaseit is but he has lost his almost weight and his stomach size is increasing day by day..  i told him to go to some specialist but he getd angry everytime.. then i stopped arguing with him..  right now he is taking  an ayurveda treatment but i am not seeing any progress.. he is getting weak day by day..  there is no fat remains in his hands an legs..  only he has a big stomach.. doctor told him to go through ct scan but he didn't..  i dont know whats wrong with him..  he has a government job and they had stopped giving salary..  it is the third month i dont know what to do..  i am suffering a lot from alm side...  sometimes i think i should leave my graduation and should start doing job somewhere..

i am jus dying emotionally and financially too.. 

i dont know what to do.. my whole family depends on my father and i jus cant see him like him..  he shouts at night because of pain.... gets angry on my mom.. 

i am single child..  now the whole burden of my family depends on me.. i dont know i should be strong or just flew into the feelings

please suggest me something.. 

i am dying..  dying

 

  • Hello Appy5673 and welcome to this forum; I am so pleased you have come here to tell us about what is happening.  What a terrible situation for you  I realise you don't know the cause of his illness but you have to start somewhere and you are welcome here (unless anyone can think of anywhere better!).  I have been looking up other cases where a family member refuses to see his doctor and it sppears the first thing to do is to visit your father's GP surgery and explain to them exactly what is happening and ask if they will do a home visit in the circumstances.  If the receptionist at the surgery is being difficult ask for a phone call from the doctor to yourself in order to discuss the situation.  You need to do this mainly for the sake of your father (and the rest of your family) and also so a doctor can sign sickness certificates for your father's employers.  You need to explain to his employers exactly what is happening; he is probably not getting paid because he has not been sending in sickness certificates.

    If the doctor thinks your father is of sound mind (not mentally ill) s/he cannot go against his wishes for treatment.  If the doctor thinks he is not of sound mind then there are things s/he can do to enforce treatment.

    I don't think you should give up your studies; if you enjoy your course then follow it - you have a long life ahead of you and I don't think that your father, when thinking rationally, would want you to stop your course.

    When your father is being angry, as I understand it, it is probably his illness which is causing the anger although he may not realise that and direct it at the people who love him.

    Please come back to us and tell us how things are going - I so much hope his doctor will get to see him.  If eventually you get a diagnosis which has nothing to do with cancer we will point you in the right direction to get support.   Annie