Oh my dear DO, I could feel the despair throughout your post.  I know very little about oesophogal cancer but I could understand your message.  And your poor husband, condemned to such a poor quality of life and you have no idea what is the right thing to do.    I had never heard of a nurse navigator so I had to look it up.  Didn't help me much.  Some people were not impressed with them, some were.  Whatever, if you are not happy with yours, do you have to have this particular one.  Forgive me if I am getting things muddled but is this nurse navigator (I'll call her the NN for short) in a kind of coordinating role and there are other nurses who come in to help with the things you mention, that is wound care, hydration etc.   Is the NN the person who should be advising you on your husband's current state of health and what you should expect?  If not, how often do you get to speak to his doctor?  

Have you had any dealings with MacMillan Cancer Support?  If not you could ring them on Freefone 0808 808 0000 and tell them all about the stress you are feeling.  They may be able to help and could I think give you advice to ensure that you are claiming al the benefits to which you are entitled. And they will listen to you as well as talk to you. 

It sounds as though you have no family or friends who are helping you through this.  Is this the case and would any friend, family member or neighbour help you if asked?

I don't know if any of this will be of help to  you but unless you look after yourself you won't be able to look after your husband.  So please determine what is the main priority for you then concentrate on that first with whoever is the appropriate person.  Also I hope you will continue to post here.