Hey

Feeling slightly fraudulent. My Father is 82, he has had cancer and beaten it twice but this time, he can't win. I know we expect our parents to die at some point, certainly at this age but my Dad isn't your normal octogenarian. He and my mother have been married almost 60 years, they have 5 children and 11 grandchildren and 2 great grandchildren. He has always been much younger than his years. We are a very close family. We are all struggling to cope with this final estimation of his remaining time. 

I've read a lot of posts and am very comforted by the support given so generously on here.

I'm not coping with the thought of losing him most especially as I suffer with chronic depression. I've been told not to cry in front of him. There are so many things I want to say to him but I know I will cry. So I'm holding it all in. 

  • Welcome to the forum Pugcrazy although I'm sorry to read about your father's situation and the reason you find yourself posting here.

    It can be very tough knowing that you may not have much time left with someone you love, especially one that has looked after you and raised you since you were born, but I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. Many members here have been in the same situation with their parents and hopefully some of them will post soon to offer their support and advice.

    If you feel like you can't say what you want to without crying how about writing everything down instead? That way you can release all your emotions without upsetting anyone. You can post here about how you are feeling as well. Many members have found sharing their thoughts and feelings on the forum really helpful at times like these and I hope you do too.

    Kind Regards, 

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

  • Hi.  Sorry to hear the news and I totally understand how you are feeling.  My mother is in the final stages of palliative care for lung cancer and whilst I have been able to speak to her with out crying ( well not much) my 18 year old daughter couldn't    So she wrote a card to her nana and I read it to her (just)    She got to tell her everything she wanted her nana to know and her nana got to hear how she felt.  Which wouldn't have been possible otherwise

    and I think it's it's ok to cry    I don't think it's about being brave   It's about being you and coping with this  however  you can 

    Best wishes to you all