I'm  sorry this is the first time I have posted on any forums not sure what I'm looking for as there is no reassurances at all I found out a month ago my dad has terminal cancer straight off nothing more they can do I'm devastated beyond words in fact there are no words to describe how I feel right now 

he is my entire world he has always been there for me we share everyday of our lives together for 35 years it's heartbreaking he only has a few months left too and as much as we are still the same in our relationship shortly he won't be there for me to share my days with 

i have older siblings but they don't have the relationship I do with him it's hard they go about their lives as if he's going to be here forever as they have done before and I'm cut up I struggle each day not knowing if it's his last 

reading this back to myself I sound very selfish don't I? Truly have no idea how to react how to be how to carry on my whole world is in this man and he's being taken from me 

I guess I'm posting here just to see if others feel the same way how they deal with the up and coming loss of a loved one how I should feel behave cope ? 

My children are in pieces everyday and it's hard to see them like this I have no idea how I will get them through this I really don't he has been our support for all their lives school run school plays football netball hockey every time they did something he's been there they miss those times terribley and will miss him he's been like he father they didn't have 

my dad is just amazingly he takes each day knowing he is loved knowing each day is a bonus trying to be positive but knowing he's on borrowed time my mum does all his daily care and I assist everyday with anything I can he apologise everyday for being weak and not being able to do things himself and everyday we tell him it our honnor to care for him he's looked after us now it's our turn to repay him 

i have shared all all my life with him with the exception of this last month I lost a baby and didn't tell him in fact I lied to him about my appointments at the hospital I told him and my mum it was routine it's was I have lost my baby and will loose my dad in such a short space of time and have no idea how to cope 

Thank you for reading this and I'm sending love to anyone and everyone who is going though anything like this x