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my step dad has terminal cancer need advice ASAP

Jack_O
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my step dad 37 has terminal cancer  its oesophagus cancer the hospital have told him he has 5 months left to live he has feeding tube going up his nose and down to his small intestine he i wanna know how best to care for him and make him comftable and i wanna know what to expect towards the end so i can make sure i can take care of him properly any advice would be great thank you

 

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    Hi Jack,

    I am so sorry to hear about your stepdad.

    My Grandad was my father figure in my life, and I lost him two years ago to terminal cancer. They gave him 6-12 months and he went on for another 3 years. I hope you dont mind me sharing this with you, but what im trying to say is that they arent always right and sometimes terminal patients can turn a corner. My only advice would be to remain as positive as you can. You have every right to cry, every right to be angry with whats going on, but be positive around your step dad because the more positive we were around Grandad, the more positive he felt and it did him the world of good.

    Each and every person is different, and I dont think you can ever really prepare for losing a loved one so close to you, but just do what ever you can for him, still have a joke and a laugh when you can, listen to his favourite music together,  try make some lovely memories and you will know towards the end you did all you could to be there to support him. Please always feel free to talk to me, or anyone else on here if you need to let things out. Do not block anything in as I did and its not done me any favours.

    Thinking of you, your step dad and your family. x

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    Hi Jack,

    Is any treatment planned for your step Dad, if only to relieve his symptoms? I'd hate to raise any false hope, but I have Stage 4 cancer of the oesophagus and given very similar news in 2013, but responded well to chemo. They are more often right than wrong, but they're definitely not always right.

    His lead lead nurse should be able to give some advice suited especially for him. Without knowing the details of his case, no-one can really give anything except general advice. 

    Assuming the worst scenario, he will need to decide how and where he wants to be treated towards the end of his life. Some people prefer to end their days at home, others in a hospice and sometimes there's no choice and they end up in hospital as their situation deteriorates. 

     

    Best wishes

    Dave

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