Hello, I hope everyone had the best of times that they could over the festive period. My son Jonathan went down to Manchester in the middle of December to be assessed for SIRT treatment, He was not very well when he went, being sick and vomiting, he returned the weekend before Christmas and was so poorly, we contacted the chemo line and they arranged for an ambulance to take him to hospital. First thoughts were gallstones, then blocked bile duct. The horrible truth turned out that the chemo has damaged his liver to the extent that all the small biliary tracts are blocked, bile cannot get from liver to gallbladder. So he is in liver failure and the meeting last Tuesday was very emotional as she told him there is no more treatment available to him and that he has weeks to liver. He cannot eat anything with fat in it as this causes him extreme pain. Very difficult to make food tasty and appetising, though the amount that he can eat is miniscule as his liver is so swollen and pressing on other organs. It is soul destroying watching my so loved son wasting away and so jaundiced, it will be the liver failure and not the cancer that curtails his life. He was 35 on Monday and I cannot believe this is happening to us. I know that so many people on this site are in the same situation and I have never felt the despair the envelops me every waking minute. I want to do what a mother should make him better, I want to keep him at my house and cuddle him and never let him go, but I know he has to be with his wife and they only live two miles from me so I shall be entrenched there in the coming weeks. I need to be with him when this wicked disease wins the battle that he has been fighting these last 8 months, I bought him into the world and its my job to be him on that most heart breaking of days. I don't know how to articulate the hurt, the anger, the anguish, there are no words to describe our pain, Everyday brings us closer to the time we are dreading, we are making the most of this precious time. . lesliexx
