Hi Gemz,

So sorry to read about your Mum's condition and that she wasn't offered any treatment. This may have been because her oncologist thought she was too weak to benefit from palliative chemo, which along with a stent seems to be the standard approach. 

I'm not a doctor, so my response is only through my personal experience as a patient and that of friends who also had Oesophageal Cancer. Have they said what grade the cancer is? This will give a rough idea of how aggressive the cancer is and how quickly it is likely to grow. I have a grade 2 cancer, which is a middle of the road type see about-cancer.cancerresearchuk.org/.../stages-types-grades

I was told I had between 6 and 18 months life expectancy when I was diagnosed. Just to prove how hard it is to get this sort of prediction right, that was 3 years ago. Sadly, I've also known people given the same sort of time scale who didn't quite make it to 6 months. It is anything but an exact science.

I know this won't be the sort of answer you were hoping for, we'd all like less uncertainty in our lives when dealing with cancer.

Best wishes

Dave

Hi Dave, 

thank you so much for taking the time to reply to me, and I am so sorry that you are having to deal with the same awful condition as my mum, you sound like you are fighting this in an amazing way. I'm not 100% sure what stage my mum's cancer is at but I remember her mentioning T3 (she really will not go in to details) and that in April that it had not spread the anywhere else, the thing is I just can't believe that she was never offered anything but a stent and painkillers, I know she was hugely underweight and very frail but with the stent she went up to 8 stone but still she wasn't a candidate for any treatment! It seems so unfair. I'm so frightened for what's coming. 

Im sorry, you must feel this same worry on a daily basis and still you try to help by supporting others. 

Thank you again 

Gemz x 

Hi Gemz,

It must be difficult for you not knowing exactly what your Mum's condition is and why she hasn't been offered any treatment. Her initial frailness may have been a factor, if she is of an advanced age the balance of risks and benefits might also have been taken into account. Would she allow you to visit the oncologist with her to ask questions?

I'm lucky enough to be in partial remission - my cancer hasn't gone away but it isn't growing and my symptoms are under control.

Best wishes

Dave

Hi Dave, how are you doing? I hope things are going well. My mum has deteriorated this last few weeks, she is having nurses visit her daily to administer a concoction of pain killers and steroids intravenously. She is suffering very bad pain in her hips and spine which is making walking nearly impossible. We live very far apart so I have been hearing what's happening but not seeing. She is still being very private about details and won't tell me much. Do you have any knowledge of when the cancer gets like this, I wish I knew how long we have left :-( I'm feeling desperate and wish I could know 

Gem