Caring for a loved one with cancer

hi everyone

 

I'm new to this so apologies if I'm doing anything wrong!

my mum was diagnosed with lung cancer (non-small cell) in May, lots of fluid on her lungs then and some shadows on adrenal glands above her kidneys and possible shadows in the opposite lung to her initial tumor.  Lymph glands also involved.

Stage 3b or 4, same outcome/treatment plan. No cure.  No clinical trial suitable.

So 5 sessions of radiotherapy, to alleviate symptoms.  Stopped any further spread.

started chemo but only managed 2 out of 4 sessions, before a urine infection led to urosepsis.  A lengthy stay in hospital, 20 days, and now she's at home.

an abscess had formed in hospital and had to be drained, it's still being drained now.

Shes depressed and frustrated and fed up.  I'm staying with her to look after her for a bit but I have to work during the day.

Im so tired.  I can't concentrate at times because there's so much going on.

No Q, just introducing myself.

staying positive, we are into month 7 and she's still here although not out of bed yet!

  • Nothing really to say here except you're not alone! I'm knackered I know that. Any friends you can get to come over, help out? At least so you can have some time to yourself. Ask McMillain about local charities (we have one that does spa days etc for carers). Even tiny things really help

  • So sorry to hear where you are in this journey.  I have been there and i also had to work but i could not do both.  i needed to be with my dad, i could not concentrate at all at work.  i was able to take time off of work and went on disability insurance till my dad passed and then for a month after.  i just returned to work now..part time, then full time slowly.  if i can offer advice, i am so glad i spent all the time i could with my dad as we had some very tender moments together as time went on.  my sister and i were there with him 24/7 and we were able to keep him at home and comfortable till he passed.  it was so hard but in the end now that i look back, i am very thankful i was there for my dad 24/7.  so many friends and family helped out with bringing meals ect so we could focus on our dad.  god bless you and wishing you and your loved ones the best.

  • Thanks Pam, for your reply x
  • Thanks Vanye, I'm not sure I'm up for a spa but that's good to know x