Hello 86hannah,

A big welcome to our forum. I am sorry that you lost your biological mum as a result of epilepsy and that your adopted mum is now very poorly with cancer. Do you mind my asking what type of cancer she has been diagnosed with?

It must be extra difficult for you as you have already lost a parent and you are now having to go through all this again. Hopefully coming to this forum and talking to others who find themselves exactly in the same situation at the moment will help you feel a little less alone and perhaps you can draw some strength from sharing your experience and hearing the experience of others who truly understand what you are currently going through.

I will now let our members come and say hello and share their story with you.

Best wishes,

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi 86hannah, 

I just wanted to tell you that you aren't alone in feeling this way. I am so sorry. 

The only advice I can give you is to live in the present as much as possible. My dad was just recently diangosed with advanced prostate cancer, and I find that when I think too far into the future I get really depressed. I'm only 26, so this has been a huge shock for me. 

Do you have any friends or toher family members you're able to talk to about this? I find that talking to other people, or just knowing that my friends and family are there for me helps a lot. And I don't think you should feel you need to stay strong for her, just try to stay true and don't bottle things up. Maybe if you are feeling upset or angry, you can always go into another room and have a moment and then come back. That's what I try to do with my dad. My dad doesn't want to see us all upset, so we try to be as positive and thankful for every moment we have with him. 

I don't think there's any right way to cope. We are all so different in the way we are able to manage our feelings and emotions. Some days it's hard to get out of bed, but then others it's a little easier. We have to try to remember that there are good things in this world too. I'm having a hard time as well. I don't really know how to respond either, but these things have helped a little bit. I hope they can help you as well.