Hi. I am new to this forum and i am looking for some support and help from people who can understand what i am going through.
I am 39 years old and have 2 children (aged 16 and 10). My mum got diagnosed 5 years ago with bowel cancer. After a bowel resection she was told that the cancer had not spread. I cant tell you what a relief that was. 9 months later at a routine check up she was told that the cancer had spread to her liver. Once again our worlds were turned upside down. They said it must have been a rogue cancer call! A liver resection later and once again she was given the all clear. Followed again by a routine check up and me pestering for a pet scan it was confirmed that the cancer was now in her glands. She had a course of chemotherapy which was gruelling.
The bonus was that the chemotherapy worked and she was cancer free for almost 3 years.
October last year mum was so poorly. Scans showed nothing. She got worse and worse. Lost so much weight and basically just didnt want to be here anymore.
January she had another scan and it showed up that the cancer was back in her liver, adrenal gland and possibly her lung.
She has started chemo again and we are now 4 sessions through a course of 8. She is due to be scanned again this friday.
I am struggling so much to cope. She is the centre of our small family and i cant imagine my life without her.
She is not positive at all which is why i think i am struggling. I am at the point where i dread ringing her up because i just dont know what kind of mood she will be in or if she is poorly.
She is suffering with diahorrea (although she was having this really bad before the chemo so i am not sure if that is something to do with the cancer) but when she is poorly she refuses to let us ring the hospital because she just thinks that we are trying to get rid of her to the hospital.
I dont know what to do anymore. I am at a point where i cant cope with anything. I am struggling to deal with my 16 year old daughter, i am stuggling with work etc. I am just going through the motions. I keep trying to tell myself to get a grip. I am a wife and a mother and i should be strong for them. I have a sister who i need to be there for and i am crumbling.
Please can someone give me some advice on how other people cope with these situations?
Thank you from a very distressed woman.