Feeling very sad today...it is starting to destroy me....

Hi,

My dad has bladder cancer and he recently had a kidney stone.   He is having such a hard time and as his caretaker it is really starting to get to me.   I am really sad, have anger outbursts and don't know how to handle this whole CANCER thing.

He was always my pillar of strenght and now he is so weak.

I am just so so so sad, praying that God must take me at night so I won't wake up.

If I feel this way, i cannot imagine what he must feel like.

Xmas is suppose to be a happy time, I am so down, CRYING all the time and getting really worried about myself.

Any other care giver feeling this way?  Is this normal?

  • Hi there,

    You are certainly not on your own with this!

    Not only have I a parent going through cancer also but I work for the NHS and I take referrals for carers going through the exact same thing! Try to contact your local NHS referral service or try to get a social worker involved to give advice, councilling or help with the actual care. Its very common for me to see this in my office.

    Hope this helps a little!

  • Hi

    Although it was my husband rather than my Dad going through his final weeks with cancer this time last year I can relate to the feelings you are having. As his carer you can still  ask for help to try and make it a bit easier to cope.  Please do not try coping all alone but see your GP, ask if you can have have referral to perhaps MacMillan or community nurses if you need practical help. You can also ring the nurses on this site at the number at the base of the page Mon to Fri 9-5 on normal working days (free from UK landlines and most mobiles) for a chat/advice.  I shed many tears and spent nearly three years full of worry and fear (its what led me to this forum which was very supportive and still is) as well as trying to support my husband, adult children and grandchildren (we were of course mutually supportive but sometimes it still felt lonely, if that makes any sense).  come back and chat if you need to as many here will understand. Sending a virtual hug.  Jules54