Hi Neaders ...... I am so sorry to hear about your Mum and understand how devastating this is for her and your family as I am in the same situation myself.  My husband and children feel the same way as you and find it hard seeing me poorly.  They feel they should be able to do something to help but in reality we all know this isnt possible.

Please dont feel your Mum is being negative when she talks about death, it doesnt mean she has given up or is becoming depressed.  For a long time my family found it difficult to say anything other than 'you will outlive us all' or 'you will be fine' and I found this really hard because it almost felt like they were dismissing the seriousness of the situation and there were things that I wanted to know would be sorted out so that I could feel at peace during the time I have left.  We now talk openly which is great and I give my children tips about parenthood and things that will happen in their future when I am not around and tell them to keep an eye on what their Dad gets up to lol! I have written down my wishes for my end of life care and funeral and who is to have what keepsake etc.  It has been a Godsend to have a family who are so open about things and taken away the isolation and fear of the unknown for me, hopefully for them too.

Your Mum is really blessed to have you all supporting her through such a difficult time. Sadly it is an awful situation for you all to be in but just carry on being there for her and making as many happy memories as you possibly can. My thoughts are that at this present time I am living with cancer, not dying with cancer.  All the best and always here if you need a chat.  Take good care of yourself x