Hello Gilda,

I thought I would welcome you to the forum and bump your post to the top as I am sure there are many here who have been through a similar experience and having had to care for a loved one who lives hundreds of miles away. In fact, a couple of days ago someone posted here who is in a very similar situation and whose mum is very far away. Perhaps you two can chat here and share your similar concerns? You can read capers50's thread here and don't hesitate to respond as I am sure you two will have a lot to say to each other.

Best wishes,

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi Gilda, I live about half hour away from my dad who has small cell lung cancer but to have 2 youngish children and a full time job.  Without the distance issue trying to fit it all in and do your very best for the person who is poorly is extremely difficult so firstly recognise that what you are facing is tough.  Not only from a practical point od view but also emotionally as I am sure you feel like if you were closer you could do more, and when your there you are then worried about the children etc etc.  My brother lives a long way away.  He is often concerned that he can't be there for dad as much as the rest of the family but there are things you can do to support the rest of the family From a distance.  These are often a huge help such as organising the rota and coordinating things if possible, my brother has recently set jp skype on my dads phone so he can feel closer to him in cinversation rather than just a phone call, this also helps with the grandkids as they can jump in with a lovely smile.  

I know this isn't directly the advice you were after but I just want you to know that by you even posting this oon here shows just how much you care and how you feel like you want to do more, but remember that being a support for your fami,y is just as important , hearing how their day has been. Listening to the challenges they may have faced that day will give them the strength to continue wjth the day to day care whlst you are at home.

Sending you big hugs 

Thanks for the replies. JJenks, it sounds like you have a lot on your plate too. I hope you are managing ok. Unfortunately my siblings don't live close to my dad either, but we are working out rotas so we take time off work to go up when he has treatment. Waiting to see how he reacts to chemo treatment to see if our approach is going to work. It's definitely not easy, but we are doing the best we can.