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Amber1965
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Hi after my mums breast cancer 7 years ago and radiation , we have just found out that she has breast cancer back and has it secondary in her brain , liver ,lymph nodes, lungs, over the last month she has been headaches and is now very unsteady , since her diagnosis she hasn't really cried , good angry or show much of anything apart from fear. She has refused treatment  .i am the nursing industry and always said to my mum she will never go into hospital or a hospice to end her life , she will come and live with me when the time comes .i have lots of experience in nursing but not brain cancer , she has been put on medication to stop swelling in the brain and other medication .i can imagine that brain cancer proceeds very quickly , I just don't want my mum to suffer forever , please tell me that it's quick

 

 

 

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    Hi Amber and welcome to the forum.  I am sorry to hear about your Mum and know how devastating a secondary BC diagnosis is for all the family.  I am in the same situation as your Mum and have had several procedures to treat my disease which metastised 3yrs ago.  I have had a resection and ablations on the liver.  In February this year, I had cyberknife/gammaknife treatment to a brain tumour which appears to have worked well.  Chemotherapy is ongoing. Please tell your Mum that there are treatments available to her, and they do work.   I was also ready to refuse further treatment but am so glad that I didnt.  Max x

  • Offline in reply to max56

    Hi many thanks for your reply my mum has completely refused treatment she is 76 and has been told to enjoy the summer . But I'm glad your doing well it's such an aulful disease Tracy x

  • Offline in reply to Amber1965

     

    You are right - it certainly is an awful disease and there are so many people suffering.  I  can understand your Mum's decision Tracy and I truly hope that she enjoys the summer with you - she is fortunate to have such a lovely daughter to care for her. Remember to look after yourself too!  Please remember that you can ring the nurses here on their freephone number shown at the bottom of the page. They are available Mon-Fri during office hours and you will find that they are a great source of information and support - a lovely bunch of people ......

    Keep in touch and I'm sending you much love and a virtual hug x

  • Offline in reply to max56

    Help I feel like I'm going mad . I'm the carer for my mum that's now moved in with us (that's just me and my husband ) children all grown up now ,but mum has a twin sister who visits every other day , every single day I help my mum wash and look after her but find my mums twin the hardest to deal with . I think because of my job and have dealt with death and dying I can accept what's happening and can cope with the situation , it's her twin and my cousins seem to be putting a lot of pressure on my mum to be ok which obviously she's not and never going to be fit and well running around as she used too.

    It feels like that every day they are calling and saying things that I find really upsetting , like their proud of her for going out , which I feel puts so much pressure on her, to struggle and do things when maybe she doesn't want too , my mums always been a people pleaser and try's to make everyone else happy , so trying to understand the bond between her and her twins inability to deal with my mums illness is very difficult , I can cope with mum and the illness is everyone's stupidity I can't 

     

     

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