Hi my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer Oct 2014, his had chemo and now on 15 days of radiotherapy, I found out on Tues it has spread now to his pancreas and his lymph nodes and his omental nodes.My dad is a tough man and don't show if his suffering! He won't and don't want to talk about it. I'm finding it hard to deal with it atm also.
my husband has stage 4 lung cancer had chemo but that didnt work had radiotherpy one blast instead of 5 days he was ok for a hile, dont know if its worked yet till we see consulatant so sorry to hear your dad has other complications ihope they that wont find that with him cant imagine what you are going through glad he is staying strong they dont want to talk about it think it is hard for them and family to accept you are not alone in this
Thank u ceil for your response, it means a lot to be able to talk to someone who's going through it! I just wish my dad would talk to us tell us what his feeling how his feeling. I want to help him but I don't know how too! I'm trying to hide how I feel cause as soon as I talk about it to anyone the tears come, it's my dad who I truly want to talk too.
how old are you ? he will talk when he is ready it took weeks before my husband wanted anyone to know but as soon as he did he felt better for it, also when he went to cancer clinic found out that he was not alone and other people had lung cancer and that he was not alone.
I'm 44 and my dad is 71! When we go to the hospital with him he doesn't even want to hear what the specialist has to say, he just says do what u have too but he don't want to know. My dad is very old fashioned and a proud man and that's what I put it down too.
My husband had a three year journey with cancer of the lung linings and whilst this is a different cancer his attitude towards it was much the same as you are finding with your loved ones. Right from the outset he did not wish to discuss it with anyone and that was how I found the forum (frustration of not being able to talk!!).He told me to come to his consultancy appointments so I could hear what was going on first hand and then he would not have to mention it. To be honest he felt it was the only way he could cope at all and was also trying to protect the rest of the family. It was not at all easy but as a family we respected his wishes the best we could and his medical team were a constant support to me as well as to him. Though we knew from the outset that it was terminal we had nearly three years to come to terms with the changes and he was always grateful that he could 'talk normal stuff' when we had visitors who were still popping along up until the day he passed away (4.1.15). I hope you find the forum as helpful as I did and send you a virtual hug. Jules54
Hi Jules, sorry to hear of your loss, I know I have to do as my dad pleases cause that's all that matters as long as his happy and not discussing the cancer then we are happy. I'm just happy I found somewhere I can talk about it and other people are going through the same situation.
Thank you for your kind words and know I found it easier to talk my way through things when times were difficult. Wish you and your family all the very best.Jules
