Hi Brian

Do hope you can get that phone call in because it will mean so much to both of you.  Emotional I know but in a good way in that you will feel better for having made it. Its sad that your Dad may not get to return home but being in a safe and caring environment is for the best (though with his strong character am sure he wont think so).  Believe you will be wandering off to the local 'nut' shop to stock up and this will give you lots of energy for when you can get back to 'fashioning your 'upmarket' owls - Mrs B will be thrilled - a whole new family to look after until you can market them!  Look forward to seeing the photo of the finished product in due time.

Thankfully my grandson is fine (usual bundle of energy so not easy to keep calm!!).  They are just off to Aldershot to a banger racing meeting (hubby supplied ear defenders a good while back for the little ones!!).  Can imagine its already 'are we nearly there yet'.

Some might see my sense of humour as a bit weird at times but think I definitely inherited it from my own Dad - a 'real card' in his day and though I definitely have my moments (usually when the kids ask if I am ok!!) of vulnerability this is a necessary part of life that has to be seen through to make us stronger.

Hubby has just surfaced and the 'feline' friends are gathering (sure they watch and see him settled in his usual chair (opposite the patio doors)).  With my son and his other half due later (with dog) they had best make the most of it!!

Take care and hope your call to your Dad goes as well as it can.  Will be thinking of you.Hugs to you and Mrs B. Jules x

Hi Jules,

I was glad to read that your grandson is OK and back to his normal self.  How are you feeling?  I expect you have been reflecting on many memories you have of your inspirational friend.  Hope you have a peaceful day with hubby, your son and his other half.  Speak soon.  Hope x

Hi Brian,

I was so sorry to read about your Dad.  It must be difficult when you live so far away, I really hope you were able to make the phone call.  Thinking of you.  Hope x

Morning Hope

Am doing OK thanks. Being able talk with my children and hubby about my friend and having witnessed her journey through cancer (on and off for over 20 years), during which time she achieved so many of her dreams as well as raising three boys along with her husband, helps enormously.  Its so much sadder for her family and my thoughts are more with them at present.  As my workmates were aware that I was visiting her last Thursday and I have not been in work since as I do not work Fridays or the weekend, this morning will be another emotional hurdle so am going in a little earlier to tell them.  Some of them had met her a few times over the years. My son and his girlfriend popped in yesterday afternoon, having just returned from their diving holiday the day before.  His other half had spent the morning in the kitchen and arrived with a large tin full of my favourite cakes so have comfort food at the ready (just when I was trying to get back on the straight and narrow with my healthy eating too - shame!).

I know you are going through the continuing grieving process yourself and this month holds especially emotional dates so will be thinking of you too. Sending hugs.  Jules x

Hi Jules,

Here is the latest addition to Mrs B's owl collection. Have a few thing to improve on the next one, but quite pleased with the first attempt.

I hear you have had a bad case of brianitus with your favorite cakes but a little of what you fancy does you good as they say. Hope the sun is shining where you are just as it is here althgough we did have some heavy showers late this morning. Take care best wishes Brian.

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Well done Brian - you have wasted no time in trying your hand at the new-eyed owl - quite a picture.

Hope you soon manage to make the all important phone call to your Dad even though you will have to burn the midnight or later oil to achieve contact.

Today its been breezy but now sunny and we have escaped any showers so far.  My daughter is coming to visit tomorrow morning with little Zack (think she wants to check up on us!! as she keeps asking if we are ok).  My eldest grandson appears fine after his 'nose accident' and is running around as usual telling everyone all about it - no doubt the ride in the ambulance helped him forget how much it hurt!!.  He enjoyed their trip to the banger racing yesterday and they are going again next Sunday with friends he has at school.  This time I will have Zack as its a long day and not easy with feeds etc.

Had a call from Mum's care home today.  Apparently she decided to walk herself back to her room (without anyone's assistance) and then had a fall as she exited the lift (they are not supposed to go in it alone!!).  She is apparently fine but they will have the doctor check her over tomorrow when she comes in to take morning surgery.They are still trying to work out how she slipped past the staff and I said she can be incredibly crafty and has probably been watching when the  best time to do it would be.  I have a feeling this could be the start of a few problems but am hoping not.

Keep up the good 'owl' workings as I am sure it is giving you a lot of pleasure making them as well as Mrs B when she gets the new editions. (but you will have to share with the extra dusting).  Hugs  Jules x

Hi Brian

Have finally caught up on this thread and love the new owl.

So sorry to hear about your Dad and I can understand that the phone call will be very emotional for you.  Not heled by the time difference either as I am sure you will be tired as well.  It is a shame that he cannot get back to the UK and that you re unable to get to Canada but at least you know he is being well cared for.

Please do and get some nuts before too long - I hate to think of you going without.

Best wishes to you and Mrs B.

Gill

Hi Jules

Have finally caught up on this thread (at least I think I have).  So glad your grandson is fine.  It is surprising how quickly they forget things like the hurt as as you say the trip in the ambulance helps no end.

Hope work is not too difficult given that it is your first day back following the sad death of your friend.

You are quite right at how frustrated I was given that I felt fine but I do understand it was for my own good.  When I spoke to the doctor who was concerned that I might have an infection given that I was on antibiotics I did ask if it was possible that I had become resistant to these given the amount I have had in the past few months.  He thought it unlikely but did not rule it out given how well my body has adapted to the chemo.

Have to say I was even more frustated today when husband got a voicemail when he got up at 1pm saying I had to go back tothe hospital.  I called to point out they should have rung me and not hubby and aske dif it was absolutely necessary.  Was told it was necessary for me to go in as doctor required to see me.  As advised to aim for 2pm.  Arrived on time and had my obs done.  Temperature was fine.  Was then told doctor was in a MDT Meeting and would not be free until 3pm.  When the doctor finally arrived at just after 3.30 he seemed somewhat confused as to why I was there.  Explained what the consultant had said on Saturday (ie that provided I came back to hospital twice on Saturday and three times on Sunday for IV antibiotics and that once the last was administered I was done).  Doctor confirmed this was on my notes.  I then told him that the nurse had called insisting I had to come back but had not really said why.  He thought it was probably to ensure the paperwork was correct for my discharge.  He confirmed he was happy for me to go and that no further drugs were required.  Nurse then said she would just wait for notes to be written up and confirm I could go.  Just before 4pm I went to chase her up and she told me she was waiting on pharmacy with my drugs.  I pointed out that if she had read the notes this confrmed I was no due anything.  She went to check with the doctor who confirmed this and I was finally let go just after 4pm.  Over two hours completely wasted.

Thankfully I am not due back until 20 May for first partial chemo and believe me if my temperature goes up in the meantime I will not be telling them anything!

Hope you have fund with Zac next weekend when the rest of the family go banger racing.  Far too noisy for my taste.

Best wishes.

Gill

Hi Gill

Good to see you are finally back at home with all the right boxes ticked for your discharge. What a waste of  your (and the doctor's) time that was and so frustrating when it could probably all been done in around 10mins!!  Do hope now that little blip has been sorted all will continue to go well with your onward recovery and am sure you know your own body well enough to recognise if your need to visit the doc again.

Going back into work was fine and my mates there are always so supportive.  The fact that a few of them had met my friend has meant they have been aware of her long journey with the illness and its good to  be able to talk openly about your feelings.  Suspect there will  be more conversation today as my daughter is popping in this morning and it has proved very emotional for her too (I think I have mentioned somewhere along the line that she and my friends son were born just 12 days apart and obviously grew up playing together - although they went to different schools   and are now married with their own families ) as it also reminds us all (as if we really need it) that my friend dealt with her situation so differently to my hubby  but that obviously comes down to personality.  Its really strange walking past her house twice daily knowing she is no longer there (one of her last bucket list requests had been to change the front door and all their ground floor interior doors (she loved to decorate herself and really enjoyed watching this being achieved just a month back).  I was so lucky to be part of her life and carry many good memories and as her husband has said he can 'rest easy' in the knowledge that they achieved so much together and that she 'did it her way'.

Have hubby's sister coming for dinner on Saturday and with his brother and sister in law now having another puppy (alsation) to deal with as well as getting their two houses ready for market before the proposed move to the Isle of Man, am sure  there will be plenty to chat about.

Am also waiting to hear how Mum is following a 'turn/fall' yesterday when she decided to take herself back to her room instead of pressing her call button! Staff were amazed she managed to 'slip past them' and go up in the lift (she is well aware she should not move without a carer nor go into the lift alone but it is obvious to us all she is becoming craftier.  Anyway she will get the once over by the doctor (the home first aid staff having assured themselves she was ok (and she saying they were 'fussing') who has surgery at the home today.  Have to say my head is throbbing this morning but am sure a spell in the fresh air (do not work Tuesdays and Fridays) and a few cuddles with baby Zack will help relieve the tension.

Look after yourself and get some pampering in place (sorry for the ramble by the way!!).  Chat soon   Hugs Jules x

Hi Jules

Thanks.  I am hoping now not to see the inside if Ward 22 (Cancer Ward) ever again.  Although the staff a great it is so boring when you feel fine.

Hope the info about your Mum is positive in that she has done no damage to herself.  As you say she is obviously getting crafty.

It is great that some of your colleagues at work knew your friend so you can talk easily and as you say no dbout there will be more today with your daugther.  I m sure there is a medical name for the positive effect of Zac cuddles.  Saw neighbours yesterday.  Their little boy was on 7 or 8 weeks old when we moved in here.  Is now 16 months+ and running around and talking.  Asked his mum where the time has gone and she was at a loss.  Said it was on 5 minutes since he was born.  I don't tend to see those neighbours that often as I always left early when I was working and have not been going out much in recent months so it was nice to catch up a bit.  The little lad (I wish I could remember his name) tried to come in to our house to see Jess the cat who promptly disappeared.  He was a bit disappointed and wanted a cuddle.  I explained to his mum that I was not strong enough to pick up at present but bent down to give him a hug.  He promptly pulled my scarf off much to his mum's embarassement.  Said it was not a problem.  It was only then that she asked why I had lost my hair and was clearly shocked when I told her about the cancer.  Our neighbours on the other side have known since the start as we see them more often and indeed I see Monica every couple of days with her little girl Eva who is 6 months old.

Hope hubby is doing ok.

Gill